Dear Dairy..

Dear Dairy.. You are my best friend.. But I havent been talking to you for such a long time... This is the most 'confused' part of my life.. I don't know what to do?

Now, I havce to juggle between looking for a house, uni and work.. Its really shit actually.. Especially having to work on monday night which is a public holiday and don't get extra pay for it.. I hate public holidays!! I always do...

My friend do tell me to quit my job, but i was thinking, is it ethical for me to quit my job just after 2 weeks.. Well, Despite the low pay, I have to discipline myself this time to break that precedent.. My last job lasted only 2 weeks.. Got fired after that.. FUCK!!

I don't want to quit my job after 2 weeks again.. Its not really a good sign.. The Problem is that I am a very superstitious person.. I don't want something to become a habit and create a precedent.. Maybe I don't agree with some of the company's policy.. But I have to stick to the status quo.. Maybe I quit after my summer holidays.. I don't know!!!!

I learned alot of things from work though.. Like time management and costumer service.. I think its quite useful for my life and my future work life.. I take it as my training for the future.. Everyone did their training first in the hotel anyway (For hospitality students) and just take it as just like that.. These 'hospitality ' students don't even get paid for their jobs.. Perhaps I shouldnt complain abou my low pay...

For Uni, ARRGHH!!! Why is it so hard to find good books and resources for my report.. Useless finding them though.. I don't know what to do now.. God!! Please help me in this matter!!!

For the house, I am still deciding which one to choose.. Either a cheaper 418 apartment with more noise but cheaper or 811 which is quieter but much more expensive.. Its quite a tough decision.. Especially when both apartments looks grand and appetising to my eyes.. In comparison with my old house...

Well, thats it for my blog.. Dairy.. Thanks for listening to my story... Byezzz

My Dearest Stefan

Dear Stefan,

Can you get serious over your work!!
You should know it by now that you are so busy!!
Heaps of assignments and Spring Feast on Thursday!!
But look at what you are doing now!!
writing this blog and pracically destroting yourself!!
Can you be more serious over your work!!!
Can you do yourself that favour!!
Maybe, you need some 'puffies' outside before working again...
But Whatever!!
'Puffies' don't help you in the Long term
All you have to depend on is self-motivation..
You promised yourself that you wanna take honours!!
but wheres the action!!
Now, get going and do you work!!
Stefan, I know that you are capable of doing this!!
You are smart, you know it yourself!!
NOW GO!!!!

Yours sincerely,
Myself

Truth and misconceptions

There are many truth and misconceptions of clubbing which many people are not aware of...

Misconecptions:

1) People go there to pick up gals and bringig them back home.. Pick up gals.. Nah.. Not everyone do this kind of stuff (including me).. it is only the superconfident and raunchy individuals who would do such a thing!! It is not that easy folks!! The image of clubbers has been tarnished by the press and media so be aware of this misconcepton as the majority of them are not like this..

2) It is a happy place.. People go there to look for happiness and and they feel really empty inside.. This could be explained by the number of fights and drugs inside these places...

3) If I go there.. I will become soo addicted.. Not everyone likes loud music and chaotic places...

4) Going there means being exposed to drugs and alcohol.. Drugs and alohol consumption depend on peer pressure, not because of clubs!!


Truth

1) People go there because of peer pressure!! You won't go there yourself unless you are extremely depressed!!

2) It is dangerous!!! Yes it is dangerous!! Look at my last blog...

3) It affects your image and spirituality.. The minority of people still have the old notion that going to clubs are bad (like picking up gals) and may not like you for doing so..

4) You won't be affcted by drugs and alcohol unless you friends are doing so..

Remember:

1) Do whatever you like but don't break the laws!!

Dodgy Night in Melbourne

Just back from holiday...

Geez... i am really exhausted...

Spending my birthday in Melbourne is really cool.. The nightlife is fantastic and the casino is just like Las vegas (Never been there before). However, its rather rough though. I went to this dodgy club in South Melbourne with my friends and the bouncers were really rough!!! geez!! It was pretty crowded though.

We went out to the Casino (Lost $40, DAMN!!!) for awhile and got my hand stamped. When we went back inside, they couldn;t see the stampt and I was thrown out of the club violently. I showed my stampt to the bouncer outside and thrown back inside.

Oh NO!!! I am like a volleyball being thrown back and forth. In the end, i went in though.. YES!!! that happen again.. Certainly, the violence did not just hapen to me. We were so tired and decided to go back home and you guess what!!! We couldn't go out of the club cuz someone was bashed up outside and the paramedics told the bouncer not to let us out.

He was bleeding so badly that there is a possibily of having a permanent damage in his body. I was told that the bouncers are so violent !! Oh NO!!!! The reporters came in and interview people on the scene. It was a dodgy night!!! Dodgy!! Dodgy!! Dodgy!!

You Guess What!!!

I was having lunch with Matt in Footscray and it was on the NEWS!!!

Until now, I am not too sure whether its pure coincidence or violence!!!

Moral of the story: Clubs and bars are not necessarily a happy place.

Spending my Birthday...

I love travelling..

I simply love travelling and European building..

Just to let you know, Melbourne is the most European place in Australia despite the high Asian population... I simply love the atmophere there...

I have lived in Perth for 1 1/2 years and for sure, I will not spend my 20th birthday in Perth (again) this time and will be goin to Melbourne to spend it... If I decide to spend my 21th somewhere else (Lets say Western Samoa) and decide to graduate next year without taking honours, it means that I will never have the chance to spend my birthday in Perth... So, I decide to spend my birthday in Perth next year and thats for sure...

It is not an easy decision to make as I have to forgo the opportunity to be with my friends in Perth.. Sometimes, I regret making that decision but i have already made up my mind.. Going to be an adult soon and not spending the time with my good friends in Perth is a heartache... At least, having the chance to be with my friends in Melbourne, being in the most European place in Australia and breathing the European air satisfies my heart... I will be going to Canberra afterwards to see the Floriade, one of the best flower gardens in the world...

Despite Canberra being alleged as the most boring and bureaucratic place in Australia, my friend convinced that there'll be alot of things to do there... Like embassy tours with a bike, watching the Australian parliament in session, climbing up the hill to Telstra tower and going to one of the numerous museums convince me enough to spend 3 nights there..

I hope that this will be my best birthday and that I will enjoy the trip very much..

Anyway, i will be going for a day trip to sydney from Canberra... I bet that I am one fo the few people in the world to do so..

What!!! Going for a day trip to Sydney!!!What are you doing!!!

hahahahhaha...

TRUTH ABOUT ME

I want to speak out all my troubles...
but I doubt anyone will listen to me..

HELP ME!!!
I am drowning..

SAVE ME!!!
I am lost..

LISTEN TO ME!!!
I can't speak...

ARRRGHHHHHH!!!!!
FUCK IT!!!
I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT!!!

I thought I am strong... I can handle everything..
in fact, I am really weak..

I say... I don't care..
In fact, I really CARE..

I say... I am smart..
In fact, I can't do anything...

I say... I am a good boy..
In fact, I am actually a really bad boy..

I say... I am really smart at doing something..
In fact, I don't know how to do it...

yes, I have agood future..
In fact, I am feeling empty inside...

yes, I have everything.. (almost)
In fact, I miss something I really important...

yes, I am handsome and cute
In fact, I am just as cute and handsome just like anyone else...

Why am i writing this.. just like someone in the middle of a sinking ship...

nothing spiritual... nothing personal... nothing to do with you..

I bare with THIS PROBLEM for ages... Its only now that I just can't take it...

How to appealing Successfully...

You are logging into the internet to check for exam results..

To your surprise, you realised that you have only 46 marks..

4 more marks to pass and you are truly desperate...

You are an international student and pay higher tuition fee for that particular unit..

You are so depressed and you feel like hitting your lecturer. What you could do is to vent your anger before it gets worse. It could be hitting the wall and make your hand bleed. venting your anger now is so much better than venting it on the email or the lecturer themselves. You could do something you like such as hanging around with your friends and be happy!! Even if its a short period of time, Its still worth it.

Now, you feel much better and ready to take the step the faith to appeal for your result. First of all, pray to God and ask for a positive mindset and energy. Convince yourself that you are able to be successful in the appeal. Believing that you are able to be successful in the appeal is crucial as it affects on how you perform subsequently.

Before appeal, I recommend you to read 'How to make friends and influence people' by Dale Carnegie. this book tells you how to persuade people and I used the methods explained in the book. The most common question here is 'What makes you deserve to get the extra marks in order to pass?'

Being asked that, you need to be honest and tell them what is wrong with the paper but don't overdo it. You should minimise this part as people hate to be wronged. Don't tell them personal problems like failing this unit incurr mehuge financial cost, it has nothing to do with the paper. Yes, I got a friend who said that and apparently not successful in the appeal.

The next thing that you should do is to use the magic words such as thank you, sorry for troubling you, give them some sort of appreciation. Remember, don't be pushy. you should say that you will respect every decision they make. Yes, you should say that to them as it makes them feel better about themselves as they are given enough respect. More like a service recovery after telling them whats wrong.

Lastly, Love that subject and be grateful that the subject really exist and believe that one day the appeal will be successful. Even if you don't believe it, force yourself to believe it every second of your life. Surrender everything to God and BELIEVE THAT IT WILL BE SUCCESSFUL!!!

Yes, you will be successful cuz thats exact what I did!!

I reallly got 46 and nowI got 50 due the appeal. It seems like a big difference but everything is possible!!!

THANK YOU JESUS!!!

Keep Believing and Magic Words...

It was a hot thursday afternoon and that was both the best and the worst day of my life. The good news is that I got a distinction for my marketing unit. It is the first distinction in my life (seriously). I am extremely happy and raved about my talents of being a good marketer despite being a difficult subject to score (not for me).

However, the moment of truth comes, I failed my statistics again (WHAT AGAIN!!!). I cried and blamed my lecturer for changing thw whole paper while it is actually my own fault. I even got drunk in front of my mom ( OH NO!!! HOW DEPRESSING!!!). I only focus on what will come out on exams instead of fully understanding it. Anyway, if you have read my previous blog that I just deleted, I will take my words back and please forget what I had said.

However, I watched the documentary about 'The Secret' and it totally changes my life forever. It taught me how to ask, believe and recieve. It is just like what the bible said. When I think about it, God is really creative, he brought me back to God through a relatively secular way cuz i simpl dun wanna listen to 'holy' things anymore. I began to pray longer and it is no longer a burden to me now.

After that, I took a step of faith and decided to appeal so that I will be able to pass my statictics. Before doing that, I tell myself everyday that I will be successful in my appeal. I prayed to God so that I will have a positive mind and not to worry about it. I even said how much I appreicate the lecturer for helping me and wrote an him the email very politely and thanked him for doing so. I change my mindset and told myself how grateful I am.

Changing my mindset completely begin to see it real fruits. Just now, I just got an email from my lecturer that I have a very good chance of having it approved. When I saw that (WOW!!!), I am so happy. What I have to do now is to continue believing and I will be able to pass my statictics for sure.... Remember, if you want to persuade someone, say it nicely.

Praise the lord...

Stereotypes: Watch your mouth!!!!

Today, I met quite a few 'crown princes' who are preparing to take oer their family business when I was helping out my dad in an exhibition and they do have the same traits. For example, most of them are studying in Melbourne, studying management and went there with their parents. Their parents looked mostly successful enough to support the whole family. Subsequqently, these stereotypes were quickly programmed into my brain and accepted those facts.

Unfortunately, My dad's biggest costumer went into my stand with his brother and uncle. I was talking to his brother who have most of the same traits except the fact that his parents are not there. They are from Malaysia and their parents are all there.

Suddenly, I mistakenly said that his brother is his dad and he said that he jokingly said that he is going to cancel all the orders. I was so shocked and explained that he looked like a typical successful businessman who have grown-up kids. Quite surprised that he is just 30 years old as not many people own big businesses at such a young age. He looks like an extremely matured-aged man thougt. Moreover, he is looking for my dad who is much older than him. So it fits like a typical father who looks like he can afford his kids to study overseas.

Well, maybe he is joking but it left me spooked for life. So please becareful of stereotypes!!!

Positive lifestyle

I used to be an extremely pessimistic and negative person. I am always bitter of people surrounding me and every aspects of life without realising the damaging effects to my life. The negative results are:

1) I am always unhappy
2) Not happy with myself
3) Holding grudges and being bitter towards other people
4) Blaming others
5) Unpopular by friends
6) Become 'emo'
7) Wrecked life
8) Sceptical
9) Abysmal marks (my standard)
10) Keeps unusually quiet
11) Isolation
12) Stressful

These are some of the negative impacts of my life. My life was so wrecked last year that I almos become 'emo' and being negative towards other poeople. It somehow strains my relationships towards other people and assuming that everyone hates you and doesnt want to commicate with you. Thus, it isolates me from the rest of my friends and hatred was bred inside my heart. In actual fact, these people may only be the minority of people that you ever know.

I criticised about everything from my schoolwork and it turns out pretty bad. I always say that I will never pass my statistics test andI did failed that unit!!! I always think of myself as being ugly and have very low self-esteem. I always say I cant do it and I indeed cannot do it.

One day,I start to reflect about my future and decide for a change in life. Realising the fact I cannot live like this anymore. I began to be more positive and start to think that being a negative person is a sin. I decide to revolutionalise myself and think of myself as a positive man to the extent of labelling myself as ANAK GAUL. Once I think positively, The real fruits starts to bloom. I always callmy self handsome and I indeed become a happy young lad with a high self esteem.

1) I have more friends
2) Assumingly more popular
3) Better grades
4) Do more things I ever want to
5) Less bitter
6) Therefore, less stress
7) Talk more
8) More satisfaction
9) Less problemo
10) Less sceptical

Now, I proved that being positive is good. Being negative is a self-fulfilling phrophecy by itself. For example, if you say that you can't do it. Most probably, you simply would just give up and not make the effort to do it. Maybe, some of you may argue that being 'overpositive' is bad. but think again,

Is negative thinking much better than being 'overpositive' all the time???

It would be much worse, trust me!!!

Camp Leschenaultia - Godsend Experience

If i were given a choice, the only comment that i would have is the "best $80 that I ever spent". The problem is, if that is the only comment I have, you can consider me a very selfish person for not describing it in a very eligible manner.

First of all, rowing the boat in Lake leschenaultia is an especially godsend experience . Even a 'religiously' staunch atheist will recognise that as well. I could imagine how beautiful the experience is when rowing the boat during sunset as it was a very tranquil and relaxing place. Perhaps a very viable option to bring your partner for a date instead of the ubiquitous movies and candle light dinners. Pleace remember to book in advance as the boatman would only arrive if bookings were made.

How about laser combats, they are pretty fun . Its just that I 'died' pretty quickly because of my meele-style combat and tring to be a commando. Somes of the games are fun particlarly the balloon battles. What we did was trying to step to the enemies' balloon and win by bursting teh most balloons. Nothing much to describe about it other than fun. But tring to put the chopstick into the bottle game is frustatingly hard. Not sure whether we are being disadvantaged by the rope =p.

The last part is the spiritual aspect of the camp. This camp is actually a christian camp and yes i is. There are prayers and sermons as well. Ka Anta mentioned about God telling him phropecies and events that are specifically true. I am not a particularly religious person but I believe that some of the phropecies made in the camp are true. Some people cried when they are being prayed and truths are mentioned by the person who prayed for them despite the fact that they may not know each other personally.

Mmine was pretty close as Ko Chan mentions that I set standards for myself and the dire need for me to say no. MAYBE (I am not sure) by praying the need for me to say no is based on his personal hearings about me as I always rave about drinking and clubbing in church. I love describing myself as a very naughty boy but its not necessarily defaming myself in my opinion.

The fact that I am in the PW, I am obliged to honour some unwritten code of conduct ( in my and the general population's mind), but by doing some of them may not describe who i am as I am always proud of who I am despite the fact that it is ethically wrong sometimes.

I think I should stop digressing myself but stating the fact that I always set standard for myself like having a partner and studies is specifically true. He mentions that despite the fact that I always pray about being rich and pawrful , but it is also used to help other people. The truth is, I always want to help my own country especially in the field of education and always dream of Indonesia having a developed economy and I need money for that. I never told him about these things but he mentions it with assurance. It was considered a miracle and amazing to me.

Maybe I should drop the notion that everyone have the same problem and praying about it will cause people to cry. Some of the happenings and miracles in church is really out of logic and rational thinking in a good way by making people believe and experience the true powers of Jesus Christ.

Thanks for reading my blog. I would like to give this opportunity thank the organisers of this wondeful camp, Ka Anta,all the helpers and the chef, Ci Lanny who sacrifice cooking sumptous food for us.

Bruxelles - Quisentially European!!!

Bruxelles is the French name for the Belgian city of Brussels. I personally like the French name. Just in case your geography is remarkably terrible, Brussels is the capital city of Belgium which is located just south of the city of Antwerp(You should know where it is =p)!!

I arrived in Bruxelles-Midi station in the afternoon feeling extremely delighted knowing the fact that this is my first city that I ever visited in mainland Europe. Honestly, it was a pretty delightful place to visit. Not many people admire this city as much as me as there are not many magnificent sights like Paris and London. They just have a simple square and antomium. Lets not forget about Brussels' famous statue, the minuscule manneken pis wearing a santa claus costume.

But it is the spirit of the city that captivates me. Brussels is home to a number of EU institutions like the European parliament. The Eurocentric feel is there beacuse abof that. I don't know why I am the only person i the world who feel that way. Besides, the city is really simple in nature and some of the modern offcie buildings have the simplicity which inspires me alot. Cuz in my mind, the ideal Europe (to me) have simple and honest looking buildings. It also have abit of the dirty Eastern European look in some places, seeing a different looking Europe is my dream come true. Its was also hazy as well, I really could feel the air of European winter.

Strange enough, Brussels is also home to my favourite Chinese restorant in Europe, jokingly called Chow Chow (Real name: Chaw Chow=p)!!! Trust me, the vegetable soup is excellent and the waffles near Grote Markt is fantastic and the chocolates as well, Fantastic. But I still find Schweiz (Switzerland) chocolates more indulgent. I do thank God that shoppers can only shop for chocolates and not wasting time on diamonds and Pradas =p!!

Alright, so you should go to Bruxelles and have fun. I promise myself to visit Brussels again and see the EU parliament and feel that I am in the most Eurocentric place in Europe. Next time, I will be there only by myself.

Eurotrip: My introduction!!

Finally, I stepped into Europe twice and this time not only to England but to most part of western Europe. It was a a bitter-sweet trip with both laughter and pain (yes!! pain!!). Now, I would like to intoduce you to the stereotypes of travellers in the tour group!! These stereotypes are not 100% correct!! Perhaps 99.9% correct!! do correct me, if ever, i am wrong. These stereotypes ae based on Indonesian ravellers!!

The Tour Leader:

he is the guy who makes sure everything is alright. Counting the number of heads, solving tax refund problems and reserve tickets for us. He is paid to do this job, nobody would volunteer to do so anyway. Their job is somehow enjoyable yet its really hardwork. they are practically working 24/7.

Quiet One:

They doesnt seem to care where they are going, they are contempt with sight-seeing tours and just go where they are directed to go. Tour guides love them because they don't complain much!!

Shopping Queen:

They love shopping sooo much!! You would wonder where they get all he money from. They shop all the branded stuff like LV, Prada and even diamonds that costs Gazillion Euros. Gosh!! Really wish I could be that rich!! I guess they spend more time n the tax refund counter more than the usual crowd do. if you ask them whether to see Mona Lisa or the biggest LV retail outlet. Most probably, they would choose to go to the biggest LV outlet.

Travelling Kids:

They are the noisiest people of all but at least they make the tour group very vibrant and a happy one.they like disturbing other kids and crack very hildish jokes. They are stil very adorable though, could be very irritating sometimes, but without them, the tour group would be very very boring!!!

Quissential Traveller:

There are two groups of Quissential travellers. The first grup of people are those poeple who have travelled overseas many times themselves but joined the your cuz they are too tired to do it themselves. They are an alright group of people.

The second group of people are very young and complaining one. They get really upset if they don't see famous sights like Mona Lisa and The Last Supper. They seems to do alot of research before the trip which they are not really supposed to do so to avoid dissapointment. and yes!! They are very upset people!!! Not really fit to be n the tour group!!

thats all for the stereotyes. Do come again!!

The Supernatural and Astral Travelling.

buI am not really a fan of new age movements and cults who believes in bewildered claims of the supernatural. But what I want to share now is my experience with another world that happens in my sleep. It is up to you whether you want to believe it or not but this is my real experience in another world. This always happen when I was asleep.

Sometimes, when I was asleep, there is an extremely rapid movement in my body and i felt that I was being lifted up from my body. At that point of time, the place was so dark that i could barely see anything there was once I dreamt of almost falling into the pit of hell and i thought that I was already dead which seems impossible in every sense. Except with the fact that my apartment went tumbling down or I got poisoned without knowing that I am already dead. It was scary isnt it.. Sometimes, i feel like I am going to heaven with the angels welcoming me. I could even hear sonds whcih scares me alot.

However, the most amazing part is that you are actually given a choice whether you want to wake up at tha point of time. Sometimes, I consciously think that I should get out of this world by waking up but it is hard to do so. It was usually until I manage to go extremely near the place and woke up. This could be due to the fact that the soul is connected with the body when you are still alive. This is what i read from some stories about astral travelling, i am not sure if it could be verified.

But whenever I woke up from the recurring dreams, i always feel fresh and seems to be free from grudges. Cuz in normal dreams, you would not feel as fresh as this. its soo amazing isnt it!! Some people may say that I am actually dissturbed by the devil but i don't think so. To me, its just my wonderful experience in the supernatural world!!

Why am I so interested in the Philippines???

Once, I dreamt of my sister telling my mom that we are going to the Philippines a year ago..Thats the time i start to get interested in the country located north of country. I am such a nerd about the Philippines that of buying the lonely planet guide book and searching friendster accounts of Filipinos and learn about their culture. Nobody similar realise how similar Indonesia and the Philippines are.

I know more about the city names of Filipino cities that the average Indonesian do. For example, if you ask any Indonesian or Australian where Baguio or Zamboanga is. They probably wouldnt heard of that place before. but the funny thing is, Both Indonesians and Filipinos love to use friendster very much. I really can't understand why and all of them have the same stupid narcissistic photos of themselves with their camera phone, its just so stereotypical Indonesian and Filipinos. But the good thing is, I sometimes find that Indonesian have better cameras. haha. it makes me want to laugh.

Learning about the Filipino culture also makes me appreciate my country even more. Such as the hiya concept, which roughly means saving face. i used to think that indonesians have a compulsive disorder in trying to save their face and I really hate that as they only can say 'Ngak enak' when theres a problem. But because of this, I realise that we are not alone, theres another culure who are also like that.

Alright, another similaities are the way the Chinese alter the name to sound local. For example, there are two versions of my surname, Ong, in both countries. In Indonesia, to make it sound local, some of the names inclue Ongko. On the other hand, It would be called Ongpin in the Philippines. Besides that. theres even an Ongpin road in Manila. haha..

Well thats my share about how similar we are and that makes me very interested in the Philippines. So, Don't be surprised why someone like me would ever wanna visit that country!! i am just very very interested!!!

Cliques are Bad!!

I hate cliques!!!
And i never have one in my life...
Can't understand why??
Well, the main problem is that they are just a bunch of exclusive people who are only talking among themselves and no to anyone else. But the worst thing, If you wanna join a clique or a group, you should conform to their believes or you could get kicked out and they will kiss your ass goodbye!!!

I have many bad experiences with them and I hate people who loves to clique...T Ihey are simply unfriendly and I can't tolerate this kind of behaviour... Yes!! I am sometime bullied with the same group of people whenI was young.. and yes!! I hate it!! That cold be the reason why I feel like quitting INDOSS cuz simply they are ran by an unknowingly bunch of clique which dominates everything and leaves no room for discussion among other members..

In fact, I hve loads of good friends and they never clique... In fact, all my very good friends are never good friends wih each other... Thats how Cliqueless I am!!!

Whats Wrong With ME!!!

My life have not been good these days. In reviewing myself for the past few months, I have been doing alot of useless things on the internet which practically didn't change my life at all. I just dn't know how to have a headstart for my studies. It may sound ridiculous to you guys but i am still on a holiday mood for the past few months. How Lazy I am, Can you guys imagine that!!

Not the typical UWA student, studying used to be pastime but now is a heavy blunder for me. I just hate studying these days, but who doesnt anyway, at least you guys still do abot of revision but i have not beeen doing so since the start of the semester and my studies are falling behind. Especially now when all my projects are piling up like mad!! I was so infuriated by that and that bloody EBS where i have to hand it work every week. Come on, can you make my life easier!! But people will always say, Life is hard!!! thats the only thing that people can say but thats fact. whats more irritating is that it is the only thing that they can say... hihi.. sounds bad...

Look, I have 2 essays to hand in top weeks time, its really driving me mad!! Please God!!! Can you don't let me go down like this. Please eliminate all the lack of discipline and indifference that i currently have. I am suffering from those diseases now. By the way, i feel much better after saying this and GOD!! Please help me pass my EBS!!

For all i know, since I am able to take the unites that I like... I would be able to do much better next year!! and yoohoo... My goal for next year... NO MORE MATH!!! Thats my goal.. And God, Thanks for the miracle that you gave me by giving my Accounting unit a pass... but please God!!

OK!! Now, i don't have to be proud of being the lazy asshole again.. From now on, i am going to work hard in everything I do.. Here's my plan for next week. One hour of EBS everyday, One Chapter of management everyday, Two Chapter of Macros everyday, finish evry tute questions and attend consultations for ITL!!!

thats it... My vision of success came back again and would like to thank God for that... By the way, My blog is always my best friend in this earth... But God is my best friend in both the earth and the terrestrial world...

Judging a Strange Person...

There's a girl in a church that people are always making fun of. I do have to admit that she is really strange and she got bullied quite badly by the members. She loves to do strange stuff like dancing randomly in front of everyone and too confident with guys which annoys people significantly. I am not here to insult or judge anyone but to let people understand why people can become so strange.


The reason why I am not as judgemental like everyone else because i used to be a very odd boy in the past especially when I was in Indonesia. At that point of time, I was very stressed out becauuse of new environmet and things like that. Not many people like me because i actually have a bad attitude problem when i was studying in Jakarta. I slammed the door loudly for nothing without showing any expression of anger and I clenched my teeth in the middle of a class. I was indeed a strange person with very strange habits and people really hate me for that. Then, i tried to act like a bloody fag which caused the guys not to go near me. I am also not conforming to the culture and wishes of my friends, so i was very isolated at that point of time and kept very quiet all the time.

But the main point is, many people think that I am strange while I think of it as perfectly normal and being myself. It is just a different perception of an attitude. Sometimes, I hate myself for being that way. It takes time for peole to realise that there is smething wrong with the behaviour. For example, it was only until recently that i suddenly stop banging the door in class without realising it. People will stop doing strange things when they are more mature. So, I do believe that the girl from the church could change ne day. So, Its really important for us not to judge them but instead to let them discover their mistakes as the more people make fun of them , the more mistakes they would make due to the negative inputs that they get.

Negative inputs or remarks would not change people, instead it would destroy them even more. So please stop tesing people who are strange. I know how it feels like to be one, it really hurts, its just that you don't realise it.

My Confession

Alot of people don't believe in love in first sight... Despite of what people say about it, I am a strong believer in it... They say that love needs a very long and arduous process of continuous selection and communication... Well, enough of what people think about it... Let me tell you my point of view... Yeah, first impression is the most lasting impression...

Theres this cute gal from Uniprep, my foundation school in Jakarta, when i saw her the first time, I suddenly fell in love with her...I am not sure why?? I am in the april intake but she is in the June intake, we are not in the same class... ='( Lets call her by the initial, M. You may not argue that it is just a crush... But if it is merely a crush, i won't be thinking of her until now... It has been months since the last time i saw... I really miss her alot... Seriously... The only thing that I want is to see her again...

I always wanna get to know her better... Whenever, I got the opportunity to do so, I was trembling so hard that i could barely talk especially when she was with her friends... I was so afraid that the smartest thing (actually its stupid) to do is to ignore her and only say hi to her when she is alone... Furthermore, theres a guy who is trying really hard to get to close with her and but they r just too shy to say the truth... hahaha... So, i back off and stay out of their way...

But I can feel theres this strange feeling... I really think that she likes me... I dunno is she still likes me now... It just feels different when i see her... i dunno why??

I am not sure whether I will have the chance to meet her to say I LOVE U... Only time will tell... I really wanna make her the luckiest woman in Indonesia, thats my dream.... I really thank God that i am able to track her friendster account and MSN... At least i still have a bit of chance to do so... If I succeed, i will be the luckiest man of earth and never to regret again for my decision to study in Jakarta for a year...

If you know who u r...

I wanna say

I LOVE U!!!!

Spending my birthday....

I was quite in a dilemma on where to spend my birthday... There are two choices that i have... Having a gathering n the city with most of my friends or inside the church camp in Yanchep...It was actually a tough decision to consider... In fact, it took me weeks to think about it...

But in the end, I chose to go to Yanchep instead... Cuz, I am in a dire need to get out of the Perth metropolitan area... I need to go somewhere totally different and far from the city... Basically to find the real Australia that i have been looking for all my life... Besides, there are only one sermon in the camp which is a good thing for me... hihi.... The games have loads of games and we practically go there just to have fun... I saw some of the pictures and it looks really nice... and yeah... theres a beach there...yahoo!!! I can swim and enjoy the natural surroundings...

TIME TO GET WET!!!

Or should i smuggle some beer for me to get pissed!!! hihihihi
cuz there willl definitely be no beer provided...
hahahahaha...
juz kidding...